Monday, March 16, 2009

10 Annoying Habits of a Geeky Spouse

So Wired has up an article about the 10 Annoying Habits of a Geeky Spouse, and yeah, it's pretty accurate.

Josh is very bad about #2, not with Klingon, but with frak. Frak to me is like nails on a chalkboard. It's so far from fuck that it just rubs me completely wrong. Even hearing it on BSG annoys me.

#5 doesn't bother me. Josh can wear what he wants and if someone around him doesn't get his t-shirt then it's no skin off my ass.

#6, oh my God, yes! I cannot tell you how much old computer crap is in our shed or how many movies and video games Josh has. Plus the action figures, books, comic books and other types of swag that he's collected over the years. I don't know how we'll afford a house big enough to store all this stuff, and it just. Keeps. Coming. Every game he buys is the special edition with the figures or the poster or the collectable packaging. I honestly try very hard not to think about it.

The other things on the list are less of an issue with Josh, but I would like to propose a number eleven: Trying to convert your spouse to your kind of geekiness via gifts.

I can't tell you how long it took for Josh to realize that if I didn't ask for a video game for Christmas/Birthday/Anniversary/etc. that meant that I didn't want a video game and not to buy one because I would say thanks but then never play it. It honestly took years of fail on Josh's part to get this. There is a scene in a Family Guy episode where Lois is opening gifts to unwrap another sword from Peter. After a few meaningful looks Josh asked if that was him. I said yes. I have a lot of 'swords' that were well intentioned, but hopeless gifts in the end.

But by and large i'll take the annoying habits of my geeky spouse any day over the annoying habits i've read about with non geeky spouses. Josh's passion for video games/action figures/comic books means that he gets my passion for dolls and collecting cross stitch patterns. He never nitpicks me over money I spend on my hobbies because his invariably cost more. He doesn't hassle me to dress sexy all the time because I don't hassle him to not wear the Gears of War t-shirt again. We'll make space for his stuff the same way we'll make space for mine. As always the geeky marriage comes down to just being a marriage. Compromise, understanding, love. Same as it ever was.


Anonymous said...

Hear hear!!!

If there is one thing that can rouse me out of my deep dark I'm-unemployed-and-I-suck-because-I'm-a-terrible-burden-to-my-friends-and-family depression it's some stupid ass Conservative dipshit trying to tell me and everybody else what to do with their bodies, money, children, genitals, and brains. It really pisses me off because these people just aren't happy unless they're bitching about something, the same thing us feminists are supposed to be doing constantly.

I say good for her for getting married. I hope she and her husband have a long and happy life together. I do not understand how so many people think that all feminists are 1. inherently lesbians, or 2. nasty snarky bitches who hate men just because. I'm a feminist, and I don't hate men. I love men. What I hate is women being objectified and treated as though they are inherently inferior to men. From what I have seen of marriage, it is what the two parties make of it. And I totally agree with you: marriage should be about love, committment, and equality among the two partners in question.

I hope to fall in love and get married one day. The two things I want most in my life are 1. a successful career as a professor and scholar, and 2. a happy marriage that will last. Whichever one comes first is fine with me. I hope and pray that one day I will find that one special man who will love me for who I am, and we'll share a nice Merlot and discuss l'ecriture feminine in the works of Margaret Atwood. That's asking a bit much though.


Jessica C. said...

Sam's computer game addiction is my fault. I got him started with the Final Fantasy series and he's been hooked since. But he doesn't complain about my crafting hobbies. He comments... I'll always be a granny when I'm knitting or crocheting, but he uses the items I make around the house and shows them off with pride. Just have to find that nice little median in marriage that most of today's marriages never find.