I know you've switching my Ritalin with Tic-Tacs. Fess up. I should not feel this shitty a mere two hours after taking my Ritalin. I don't know what sort of sick person would change out someone's sleep disorder meds with breath mints but you hired them. I demand a return of my $10 co-pay, an apology and a $500 gift card to compensate me for feeling so shitty all the time I should have been feeling better had I been getting my meds.
If you do not comply I will be forced to stage a sleep-in protest at your store until my demands are met.
You have 48 hours to respond.