I Know You're Dying to Know...

What I will be watching this summer now that Bridezillas and I are done for real. Now that i've packed up it's things and left them on the porch for them to pick up while i'm at work. Now that i've unfreinded them on Facebook. Now that i've not answered their calls enough for them to stop calling completely. It's time to move on and what's summer without TV? So in no particular order...

Expedition Africa

This isn't my usual TV fare, but I caught part of the first episode and I was hooked. I would like a little more information, like why these particular experts were chosen for this show and why they're trying to recreate Stanley's expedition, and why they're trying to do it in 30 days when it took him nine months, but whatever. Plus you have to love in the opening when an anonymous hand takes a magnifying glass and swirls it over a drawing of Stanley. It's so fast I missed it the first few episodes but I caught it yesterday and rewound to see it again and again. So corny! It cracked my ass up! And the dangers are my kind of dangers, bug bites, parasites, malaria, all things I have a morbid fascination with. So this has taken the place of Bridezillas in my Sunday night 10 pm slot.

16 and Pregnant

I can sum this one up in one word: schadenfreude. I know it's not nice, but well, I feel better knowing that i'm not 16 and pregnant and I don't have a pregnant 16 year old to deal with. Plus, you have to admit there isn't much in life that provides more drama than a teenage pregnancy. Two episodes in I feel a lot of admiration for the first girl profiled, Maci, and a lot of stabbiness for her baby daddy Ryan, and a mix of the two for the second girl Farrah. I'm hooked.

Obsessed

No surprises here right? This is Intervention for Psych majors. And in my case former Psych majors. I love that they are profiling people with different types of OCD, not just people who are washing their hands 50 times a day, I love that the process is explained to the audience, I love the therapists, and I really feel for all the people who are getting help. Well, except for the guy who worked out 10 times a day. He was annoying and didn't really seem to want help. But otherwise I dare you to watch this show and not think "That poor person. Thank goodness they're getting help."

Intervention

Again, no surprises here. I've been watching Intervention for the past year or so and I really do enjoy the show. The past season I think it's gone down hill a little bit. The people profiled have gotten a little less sympathetic, and in this second half of the season the only subjects I found really compelling were the anorexic twins. But whatever, I still love Candy Finnegan, Ken is growing on me and last night was the triumphant return of the incomperable Jeff Van Vonderan. I'll keep watching. I love this show like crazy!

Kendra

File this one under B for Brain Candy. I didn't watch The Girls Next Door regularly, but if there was nothing else on (and there wasn't one rainy night in an Asheboro hotel room) I would watch it. And really, I did enjoy it. Hell, it was the rare reality show that didn't involve people screaming and fighting with each other. They actually got along and seemed to like each other. So now Kendra has found love with a football player and must make a life outside the Playboy Mansion and of course hilarity will ensue. If you want a half hour vaction for your brain watch Kendra. It won't disappoint.

Flipping Out

This show isn't back yet, but it will be and I will watch it. Why? Mostly because i'm not sure about Jeff Lewis and i'm hoping this season will give me enough information to decide if he really is OCD in his personality or if he's just an asshole. Last season I waffled between the two and finally had to throw up my hands and say I Just Don't Know. I guess i'm also somewhat interested in how Jeff's business is doing with the financial crisis, and how Jenny is now that her marriage is over, but mostly I just want another crack at figuring Jeff out. And I want to see Zoila. I love Zoila! Go Zoila! Go Zoila!

The Golden Girls

Yes The Golden Girls. This is a great show! I've probably seen every episode 10 times, but they're still as funny and touching as they were when I watched them as a kid. I actually started watching them again by accident. I was looking for something to watch in the evening instead of Gordon Ramsey's F Word, which I couldn't get into, and Ramsey's Kitchen Nightmares, which I love, but have seen every episode 50 times. I found The Golden Girls on WE and now i'm hooked all over again.

So there you go. Even though i've moved on from Bridezillas I still have a rich TV gumbo to sup on this summer. Because summer is about being inside, cut off from the world, and not really discovering any thing new.